i'm very tired now. really very tired.

but in the midst of all this fatigue, i feel oddly accomplished. even though it's not 100% perfect or complete, i know that at the very least, i've done something i can build on.

i'm tired. but happy.

Isaiah 58:14 ...then you will find your joy in the LORD, and I will cause you to ride on the heights of the land and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob."

Hearing :: sound
Aggression :: fierce
Charged :: batteries
Traveler ::
Hydrate :: rivers of living water
Detox :: health-conscious
Qualify :: f1!
Prison :: behind bars
Frontal ::
Pep talk :: sports

Labels: unconcious mutterings

One night I dreamed a dream. I was walking along the beach with my Lord. Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand, one belonging to me and one to my Lord.

When the last scene of my life shot before me I looked back at the footprints in the sand. There was only one set of footprints. I realized that this was at the lowest and saddest times of my life. This always bothered me and I questioned the Lord about my dilemma.

"Lord, You told me when I decided to follow You, You would walk and talk with me all the way. But I'm aware that during the most troublesome times of my life there is only one set of footprints. I just don't understand why, when I need You most, You leave me."

He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you, never, ever, during your trials and testings. When you saw only one set of footprints, It was then that I carried you."

---

this is a story i really really like. i remember that when i was in BMT at tekong, there was a poster with this story stuck above one of the urinals in the toilet at my floor. at that time i had left God, i had left church, and wasn't even remotely thinking of one day coming back to church. but somehow, i will always end up doing my business halfway at that specific urinal before remembering that this was the urinal.

in the end, somehow God just engineered circumstances that led to me going back to church just before i POC-ed. and it has been a roller-coaster ride since then. i'm glad to be where i am now, because i know this is where i know God wants me to be now.

just as i've missed my mark before, and God having a redemptive plan for me, so He has for you if you'd turned away. don't miss the next chance. (:





just read jian ming's blog about the trip to CHCKL. and WHOA. the live feed crew don't use walkies. WHOOOA. he said that they depended on the Holy Spirit, and just flow along with Him. WHOOOOOOOA. and when you think of the times when we said that "aiyah, the walkie not working again, then in the end cannot deliver..."
looking forward to the day we do sound without walkies... LOL!

Heist :: robbery
Hack :: server
Dane :: danish
Stings :: bee
Monkey :: chimp
Junkie :: drugged
Pumped :: iron
Brass :: copper
Fight! :: cheong ah
Vouch :: swear by

Labels: unconcious mutterings

this warrants a post by itself.

first, it's my first ministry, and my first love in ministry.

second, they're going to buy me a MacBook Pro.

:D



haha, thanks people, for that pretty-ful card! really miss holding a camera, standing on stage zooming in and out, slapping the walkie-talkie cos i can't hear the director and my shots show it, the times we came to church early to prepare and practise shots, we went up to the alfresco to gobble down our lunch in 5 minutes, the times when we delivered a great service and the exhilaration, the times when we weren't up to standard and felt a bit down..

i miss live feed, but i know i'm doing what God has asked me to do in a time like this. and i know when the time is right and when God calls, i'll be back.

i've been spending quite a bit of money recently.

first, i bought my guitar on saturday. then today, i bought a new wallet.



i justify that by the fact that i need a new wallet.

yes, if you see my old wallet, you'd agree too.



of course, you could say it's shopping therapy.

and boy, it works. :D

whee i just bought my first guitar yesterday!! after three/four years of thinking of buying one!

i really like the sound from the guitar haha, it was the best out of all i heard while looking around.. thanks wen jun - for helping me out! :D

now all i have to do is to learn it, but hey, i'm not going to buy a $200+ guitar just to put it there lol.. i'm just so excited.. one step closer to my vision! xD next on my sidebar will be guitar links LOL..

Hati Hamba (Chinese)
我永远不会忘记
主你那丰富恩典
如今我在天父怀中
因为你舍下自己

你不看我的过去
只是完全接纳我
主你的爱何等伟大
我的心完全融化

我亲爱救主
我心何等感谢
你单单在意
我这爱你的心
我愿一生
追求跟随我主
谦卑为你
服事这世界

我亲爱救主
我要一生敬拜
在我生命中
你是唯一的爱
毫无保留
我愿献上所有
何等渴慕
能为你而活
耶稣我主






really one of those weeks where i really want to shout TGIF haha.. it's just been a crazy week, and now all i want to do is to fall asleep on my bed and wake up tomorrow realising that this is all but history..

i miss church. it's somewhere where i can really relax, really not worry.. nvm, 14 more hours and i'll be there haha.. (:

buying guitar tomorrow! it's going to be amazing. (:

All - Hillsong
You're the one who gives me shelter
And You're the light that leads me home
You're the love that gave forever
Lord You're all that I know

With the world upon Your shoulders
Lord You gave Your life away
If the world I know was over
I know I'd have life in the price You paid

And I will stand
And I will worship You forever
For all You are
And I will stand
And all to You I will surrender
I'll worship You forever






standing for Christ all the days of my life

Cut the crap :: shut up
Scent :: lavender
Vanishing :: voldemort
Wetness :: leaking aircon
Cheap :: snip avenue
Badges :: flashy
Puppy :: cuteee
Problem solver :: thinker
Gambling :: no-no
Sophia :: maid [LOL]

link: http://subliminal.lunanina.com/

Labels: unconcious mutterings

I dreamt that I had an interview with God.
“So you would like to interview me?” God asked.
“If you have the time” I said.
God smiled. “My time is eternity.”

“What questions do you have in mind for me?”

“What surprises you most about humankind?”

God answered...
“That they get bored with childhood,
they rush to grow up, and then
long to be children again.”

“That they lose their health to make money...
and then lose their money to restore their health.”

“That by thinking anxiously about the future,
they forget the present,
such that they live in neither
the present nor the future.”

"That they live as if they will never die,
and die as though they had never lived.”

God’s hand took mine
and we were silent for a while.

And then I asked...
“As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons
you want your children to learn?”

“To learn they cannot make anyone
love them. All they can do
is let themselves be loved.”

“To learn that it is not good
to compare themselves to others.”

“To learn to forgive
by practicing forgiveness.”

“To learn that it only takes a few seconds
to open profound wounds in those they love,
and it can take many years to heal them.”

“To learn that a rich person
is not one who has the most,
but is one who needs the least.”

“To learn that there are people
who love them dearly,
but simply have not yet learned
how to express or show their feelings.”

“To learn that two people can
look at the same thing
and see it differently.”

“To learn that it is not enough that they
forgive one another, but they must also forgive themselves.”
"Thank you for your time," I said humbly.

"Is there anything else
you would like your children to know?"

God smiled and said,
“Just know that I am here... always.”

-author unknown

finished my Flash template! haha, managed to find out the incriminating code, and volia! everything's done!

i realised that living by knowledge is not enough.. we need to live by revelations.. =/


learning to become a more spiritual, spirit-led person.

House :: home
Think :: too much
Clot :: blood
Believe me :: faith
Fumigation :: eradication
Bore :: army
Luck :: good
Patient :: doctor
Tremors :: run
Pickles :: subway

link: http://subliminal.lunanina.com/

Labels: unconcious mutterings

super tempted la.. but no point getting a nano when:
1. i'm going to get a iphone next year
2. my music library is now more than 10GB, and is set to grow still..

but NO. i'm not going to spend 200plus on another ipod nano. i'll save that up haha..

i'm getting my guitar next saturday though! going down to peninsula or bugis with wen jun who'll help me along haha.. super excited! i think it's going to be very very fun! (:

can't wait! :D

i'm super tired..



really..






but just a little bit more.

you probably can't tell that i'm excited through words. nor if you see me physically now.

but oh, am i so excited for the coming months, for the future.

hoGc is gonna break 1400.
1050 youths.
d8 20.
believe in it.

it's time for growth! everyday since last wednesday to saturday was like a lesson plan in itself!

had children's church rehearsal on wednesday. though it was a good prac, there were other character issues about me that were dealt with la, and even though when Joanne said something she didn't really direct towards me, it still struck my heart la. that as a soundman, i'm part of the altar call. and if it crashes, we are responsible. yup. (:

rushed down to meet the rest of the d zone chalet people with d50! haha, it was quite amusing, choong kai, godric, ranford and fang qi squeezed into the back seat (though it wasn't that much of a squeeze, choong kai and godric quite small size!), and the taxi driver was a bit unhappy haha.. then we really just talked CRAP all the way there! lame jokes abound man LOL! when we reached changi village most of the people already finished eating, so the five of us sat at one table, and ALL of us ate the bak chor mee haha! we also ordered stingray! :D then wen jun, darryl and i shared omelette, before dom, shuyi, evonne, cavin, ranford and i went to the opposite store to buy DURIAN!! haha we ate until like super full for that dinner man!

went back to the SUPER ULU chalet, and after a while we all went to one of the rooms to worship God la.. the anointing and presence of God was oh-so-powerful la. dom shared with us a sharing after that, and goodness me, it was just WHOA. fear of the Lord. that would explain what hopefully will come out in my blog sidebar soon at 2140! (still looking for more verses to add in!) LOL. shared with shuyi what was on my heart after the sharing, and was really really impacted for a changed me =P

after that we just started to hang out, and i started to pick up whatever i could about the guitar from everyone there. going to buy my own guitar soon, and my dream is to play for d8 (20!) by december! i might not be very good then, but it's the heart that counts! haha :D

i'm really excited for growth.

feeling super tired now.. as though i haven't slept for ages lol.. really don't feel like going work tomorrow.....

character. i still need loads of molding in this. fear of the Lord come upon me, teach me in Your ways. without the fear of the Lord, i'd rather not rise up and lead. without the fear of the Lord... it'll just be quite sad ain't it?

looking forward to the harness of the Lord. it's the only way i can grow to who God wants me to be. and flourish into my destiny. :D off to do QT and sleep.

and i felt so refreshed in God.. :D it was really a superb experience last week, being able to pop by church for prayer meetings, to go for CG, to just relax in God's presence, to hear God speak to me and just to enjoy fellowship with God and my fellow church-mates!

saturday's children church was super anointed. who ever said that young children cannot experience God, cannot know God because they are young? on saturday i saw many kids in God's presence, touched by His love, being challenged by Him.. who said older people are too old to receive from sermons for children church services? on saturday, i just felt so challenged by God, heard God speak to me so clearly, felt so ready to rise up to the next level..

d8's nearly at boiling point already.. i feel that the season for growth will come soon.. like shuyi said, now is the pre-season for growth, just going out, loving people.. when the actual growth season comes, d8's going to explode.. get ready for it. :D